In the film, "Letters to Juliet", Amanda Seyfried's character, Sophie writes an incredible letter that begins, "'What' and ‘if’are two words as nonthreatening as words come. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life".
If how you felt back then was so powerful then who is to say it isn't now. "What if...?" Maybe he got away when you turned your back for a split second and took his chance to run. Maybe they slipped through your fingers. Like when your hands are so numb that you can't control them anymore. You can't grip onto things as tightly as you used to and these things that you once held so strongly go crashing to the floor, straight through the gaps in your cowardly fingers and you don't feel a thing.
If he ever came back, what's to say that he won't get away again? I'll have to wear gloves next time to stop myself from losing grip. I know I will try everything in my power to prevent it from plummeting at my feet. Maybe he'll find an escape again. He can find your biggest flaw and use it against you. He'll squeeze me so hard I'll have no choice but to suffocate. What if he never intended to leave me at all, but to just leave where we were for a while? What if his intentions were never clear? What if he wants to come back but can't? What if he already has and I was too busy or I wasn't around to see what was going on? What is he wants me back in his life just as much as I need him? I'll probably never know the answers to these questions but these kinds of thoughts bring you the worst kind of pain. It's like there's something squeezing you from the inside but you can't physically feel it. There's no purple bruise that you can label with a time and date, no battle scar with an in-depth historical notation. You just have your thoughts that you have neglected to share with anyone but the moon and stars.
What if the one who got away, came back? What does this even mean?! Is it asking what your reaction would be if you saw them again for the first time? Is it asking what your relationship with them would amount to this time? Is it asking if you would ever accept them back in your life? Just for reference, I never used to believe in second chances. I believed that people would either have their shot and that's all you need if it's something you really wanted. But maybe you ran out of time, or something was holding you back? Maybe God really wants the best for you or you needed to take it slowly. So maybe some people deserve second chances and I hope I get mine. I hope he comes back.
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